AISubs v3.7
Hello, everybody, and welcome back to SideQuest.
If you were here last time, you will recall that I am attempting to deal with a boss problem...
and quite the quarrelsome boss he's turned out to be.
We can do it, though.
I am beating Artorias this episode.
It's gonna happen.
Those first four failures don't count.
It's happening for real.
Here we go.
Okay.
I can do it.
Ow.
Well, we traded blows.
He may have hurt me far more than I hurt him, but...
doesn't matter.
Mmm... dodge!
Ugh, come on now.
Did I just completely miss?
That would make me sad.
Right when I'd...
Dah! No!
Stop trying to hit me!
That's what I'm trying to do, but to you, though...
Listen, it's not that complicated.
Ehh...
Okay...
Dodge! Yes! Got him!
Ha! I hit you once!
Let that be a lesson.
Mmm... okay... dodge! Yes! Got the timing.
Figuring 'em out. Good.
Jump at me again, I dare you.
Nyah!
Okay, I'm learning!
I'm getting better!
I am slowly becoming mediocre at Dark Souls.
Ah!
Watch it!
Rude!
This is as far as I've ever gotten, though. This is great.
I'll take this.
Mmm... no!
Bad!
Bad, corrupted knight!
Okay, here we go.
Just gonna heal up, just in case he does something crazy.
Here we go.
Nyah!
Ow-kay...
You guys saw that, right?
Was that as one-shot-kill as it looked?
Well, then...
Fifth time's the charm. We can do this.
I was doing so well, too.
Artorius... you scamp.
Aaah!
[ominous music]
Let's all agree that that didn't happen.
Right, fifth time's the charm. We can do this. We can do it. We can... we can... ugh.
[rap music]
Okay, so we've learned a lesson. We've learned a lesson from our failure.
This time, when he comes after me with a one-hit-kill move...
I'll just dodge perfectly.
It seems so obvious in retrospect.
Ha! Gotcha! Ow! Okay, well... fair enough.
Dah!
No! Don't... stop it!
I'm getting reckless in that I am choosing moments to attack that are not... guaranteed safe.
That is... my current problem!
Okay.
Yeah, 'cause sometimes he just does that twice in a row, I guess.
[explosion]
Ahhhh, I hate it. Don't like it.
Yeesh.
He just does not let up.
Okay.
Hit!
That is the opportunity to hit.
Like, when he does the big jumping...
...pounce...
...I guarantee you'd have a window to hit him afterwards.
Okay, so, heal up all the way...
...pray you don't get hit!
[explosion]
Ha! Okay, he can do it again, and he will.
Ow!
But that's okay--oh, a third time I get!
Come on! Really?!
That does so much damage!
Unreasonable, Artorius.
You're unreasonable.
[music]
You know, I wasn't expecting that we were gonna need another mood music montage, but, uh...
I think I could use a little determination right now.
Why don't we do that?
You can't stop me, Artorius.
I hail from the future!
And I already know how you end up.
Stop hitting so hard!
Ah, come on!
Ah, you jerk.
I can dodge you. I can do this all day. Mostly. I can't do it all day. I have proven several times that I cannot do this all day.
Okay, here we go.
Here we go.
C'mon you.
Gimme an opening.
Stop being a dork.
Ah, thought it was an opening. It was not.
Ah, okay. Okay. Okay. And three.
Ah, and then you dodge. Of course. Ow!
Of course.
When did you get to be such a jerk?
Ah, stop it!
Okay. Okay, you're so close. You're so close to dying. Can't you just die?
Ha!
No...
Yes! Gotcha! Ha ha!
Man, that was a challenge!
Wow!
That was a challenge of a fight!
Really satisfying, though.
A satisfying sort of challenge.
So was that actually Artorias or like a weird possessed version of him?
Is this where I came in?
I think it is.
Whew! Okay.
Oh, man. I'm just...
kinda...
letting myself...
mentally and physically cool down after that.
What was the item we got? Let's see.
Soul of Artorias.
It's much more purple and corrupt-ish looking than a lot of the rest.
Soul of the Knight Artorias, victim of the Abyss.
Interesting.
Is that gonna be me?
Am I going to be the actual Hero of the Abyss here?
I'm calling it. That's what's gonna happen.
I am the Hero of the Abyss.
Maybe.
I don't know.
I'll tell you what I do know, though.
That's a bonfire.
And I could use it.
Yeah!
Bonfire!
Okay, let's get back to exploring now that's handled.
See what's going on.
Hmm, should I head this way first or...
I should check and see what was happening with those stairs...
...around the Coliseum here.
Hmm...
Go this way first.
Battle of Stoicism Gazebo.
What is this now?
"Team ruins"?
"Duel ruins"?
Battle of Stoicism is only available online.
There are three types of Battle of Stoicism matches
duel,
team,
and "deathmatch."
Earn consecutive wins to be etched in the slate of legends.
Oh, that's kinda cool.
So, just a PvP thing, then.
Still cool, though.
Won't be partaking in that, I don't think.
Still neat that they added it.
What. Is. Up. Here?
Is it just a nice view, or is there something else to see?
I always welcome goodies
Hmm
What have we in here?
Locked door. Okay, well
I suppose that is that.
Unless there's something off this wa- ah, there's an item. Ha!
Thought you could hide this from me, dark souls.
I think not.
My cat is snoring really loudly again. I don't know if the mic picks that up. It probably doesn't, but...
Loud cat snores.
Okay.
Let us explore down into this place. I've already forgot the name of it.
Oolacile Township. Okay.
Ah! You're different. You're different.
Ah, you still die, though, so... that's fine.
Looks like Oolacile has seen better days.
I mean, I'm in the past and yet this place is still a ruin.
Ah, hello.
Ah, there's two of you.
At least you aren't so bad.
Okie dokie
Well, let's deal with this
Yah!
That feels good
Bloated head
That merits reading an item description, I think
Is that armor?
That seems just silly enough to be armor, it is
The head of an Oolacile resident? Oh no!
Oolacile is in a bad way
Whose humanity went wild after being devoured by the Dark of Manus, Father of the Abyss
The bloated head is fissured with cracks lined with innumerable tiny red eyeballs
with a hard outside and a mucus-filled inside
no insane person would ever wear it
Yeah, I mean, I don't want to
Yeah, everything about it sounded quite unpleasant, but...
I hope these good townspeople are happy with their choice of hat wear
Is this another elevator?
Maybe it's not active yet
Nope, not yet
I bet it will be!
Gotcha! Both! Ha!
Take that!
And I'll take that! Thank you!
Large, tight night shards are fine by me
Okay
Nope, you're different, you're different, you're different
I'm quite different, what are you?
You still die quickly at least
That I appreciate
Oh, you got...
Got right through my little sightswing there
That won't do
Meh!
Let that be a lesson
Hmm, item!
Oh, hey!
I see you... there!
That's right!
Scythe didn't like you!
And I don't like you either
Hmm...
Two path options here
But this looks more like the side street
Let me check this out first
See what awaits...
If anything
Hello?
I see you!
And I got you!
I'm worried that these enemies are lulling me into a false sense of security because...
...they've been pretty easy so far.
Hmm...
Could probably jump down there, but it's not like it would get me up to that item...
...at least, not that I can tell, so...
Let me go back around.
Okay, okay, okay. And I gotcha! Okay.
Don't like fighting on narrow bridges, that is...
not a thing I enjoy.
It's a very vertical level in general. It's kinda cool.
And you are... safe.
No you're not! Crap! Oh no!
That's what I get for being reckless.
I deserve it! I deserve it.
I thought it was safe... it was not.
Very not safe.
At least it's polite enough to let me heal up first.
What was that?
Not sure what that sound was.
Anyway, I'm gonna give you what for.
Die... you... jerk.
Trapping me.
Very good carving.
That's an interesting item name.
Wait... too far.
Have another look - does it not appear quite jovial?
Very strange.
Even this late into Dark Souls, the game still manages to continue stepping up its weird game.
What is that sound?
Maybe it's you.
Mayyybe it's you!
OK, gonna have to run across this bridge...
...to not run into problems with you, though.
Die!
OK.
I'm making my way down. Still got a ways to go, but...
...made some progress. Think I started all the way up there.
OK.
Now let's heal one more time.
OK.
All right.
Gah! Hello.
Wasn't paying attention.
Got what I deserved.
OK, I'm seeing corruption stuff here again.
Stuff tied to the Abyss.
And...
I'm definitely gonna run into something mean in here.
No question.
Gah!
Gah! Well, I expected worse than you. I'll be honest.
There has to be some sort of ambush.
Or something.
Something overhead?
I don't trust this room.
And I believe I am right to not trust this room, see?
Gah! Stop it!
Anyone else?
Now is the time!
Alright. I'm taking this.
Oh, dark souls. Always with the sense of humor.
Okay. Let's press on.
Were all of their little face eye things glowing red from the beginning?
I don't remember the ones outside early on having the glowy red eyes and it's...
I mean, even if they still die in one hit, it's a bit more unsettling.
Can't tell if they cause more damage or if they're just more intimidating and it's my imagination.
Hmm.
You know, I was kinda hoping I could drop down and hit 'em, but maybe not.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Oh, okay, it's just poison.
Just poison. I can live with poison!
Poison's nothin'!
I survived Blighttown. You can't do anything to me.
Ow! Well, okay, maybe you can kill me. You very nearly killed me.
Aaaaaah! You did kill me. Okay.
Well...
I was getting a little too complacent.
This is just the kick in the pants I needed.
All right, I think I'm gonna kindle up this bonfire here so we can, uh...
have a bit of a safer journey downward.
as I make my way back down into the Oolacile Township...
and explore it further.